The Working Parent Vs. The Homemaker

Last night the hubby and I were watching Guys with Kids and it got me thinking....do working parents have a tendency to under estimate the hard work a stay at home parent puts in?  From my perspective, I think so.......sometimes at least.  My husband works all day, comes home, and all he wants is to relax and unwind.  But then here I am working all day (and yes, staying at home with a 2 year old, trying to clean, cook, take care of him, and do homework is a job!) and when he gets home....all I want to do is unwind.  Both of us can't do that....someone still has to finish up dinner, clean up the dishes, put away the leftovers, and take care of the crazies....I mean kids.  Who do you think is going to win the chance of relaxation?  Society has labeled the stay at home parent a few ways.....one being the lazy parent who doesn't want to work.  For any parent that has to (or chooses to) stay at home with young children.......you'll know there isn't time to be lazy.  If you had the pleasure of spending 30 minutes with me and my son.....you'd be askig if I even get a chance to use the bathroom during the day (yes....he's that active).  What about nap time?  If you are lucky to still have nap time (which my son has opted out of) then you'll be spending that time trying to make your house look halfway decent after a morning of playing!

I respect the working parent.  They push themselves putting the finacial stability of the entire family on their shoulders.  But when will the stay at home parent get the same respect?

We Survived....

I was 17 when I gave birth to my daughter. At 36 weeks my doctor noticed that my blood pressure was abnormally high. So they ran some tests. When I went in for my 37 week appointment, my BP had spiked even more. At that time they determined that I had preeclampsia. They induced me within a few hours. 5 years later my husband and I tried for baby #2. From the start they watched my BP. At 30 weeks we started to see a rise in my BP. My doctors visits got longer as they kept me for observation every week. At 36 weeks my BP had gotten dangerously high (for me and the baby). Out of fear that this could possibly result in preeclampsia again, they induced. My son's heart rate began to slowly decline during delivery because of my blood pressure (which had gotten worse during delivery). Since the birth of my children, I have experienced high blood pressure and depression, both of which my doctor said could have been affected by the preeclampsia. My daughter's doctor believes she may have adhd, which potentially (but not for certain) have been caused by the preeclampsia. Both of my kids are healthy and bright, but the effects that this disease has had on me and my daughter, and will continue to have on us, could be a struggle. At last year's Promise Walk for Preeclampsia, my daughter wrote on the sidewalk "mommy and me survived"........and that we did. We are survivors.

To find out more about preeclampsia, or to find a Promise Walk in your area, visit PromiseWalk.org or Preeclampsia.org.

Bad Mom?

I consider myself a good mother and wife.  I do everything that I am suppose to do for my family, and usually without complaining.  Being a stay at home mom means that this is my domain.  It is my job to ensure the happiness of my family, but what about me?  I would like to note that I am so very happy and grateful for my life.  I couldn't imagine my life being any different.  But sometimes it seems like my role may be taken for granted, making me feel unappreciated.  I wake up in the morning, get thrown straight into my job (without even being able to brush my teeth first might I add!).  Then I work all day with little to no rest (my toddler has decided naps are for chumps).  Then my husband comes home from his 12 hour shift (this is break time, right?).  Now not only do I have both kids to take care of, but my biggest kid of all (the hubby!).  I know I'm loved and that my family respects what I do, but it's just that feeling we all get from time to time (mom's you can't deny that you've never had this feeling before, because we ALL have, we just don't have the courage to admit it sometimes).  But does this make you a bad mom?  Society views us moms as some sort of super bionic being that is capable of multi-tasking and has nerves of steel......anything less is just not acceptable.  The reality is being a mom is hard work no matter how you look at it.  After all, we're only human, right?

That Time of Day

My husband manages a restaurant, so he has to put in long hours (12 hour shifts to be exact).  You would think by the time3 or 4 pm rolls around I'd be going crazy waiting for him, well, that's partially true, but it's when he leaves in the morning that it's the toughest for me.  When he leaves in the morning, the kids and I are still sleeping.  So he usually goes about his business getting ready, and then gives me a kiss before he leaves every morning.  Most mornings I sleep through the alarm clock, the light getting turned on, and his kiss, but every so often, he wakes me up.  That my friends, is the hardest part of his 12 hour shift.  I don't know whether it's the fact I know it will be 12 to 13 hours before I see him again, or the fact that now I just lie there feeling so lonely, without my hubby to hold onto.  That, is the time of day I dread most, his 5 am wake up call.

We're All Mad

I've never been one for keeping a diary, and maybe that's the problem.  See, I'm a stay at home mother of two, an 8 year old girl who thinks she's an adult, and a 2 year old boy (if you're a mother of a boy, you don't even need me to start explaining him).  My choice to stay home wasn't one that was forced upon me.  It was a choice that took a lot of thought and discussion between my husband and I.  I love being at home with my kids everyday, but it does tend to get a bit crazy.  By crazy, I mean me, I think.  You see, my two kids are very energetic, so yes, they are crazy too.  But if you're a mom, especially a stay at home mom (no hard feelings to the working moms because you rock too!), you know that the words "break" and "privacy" no longer exist.  In turn, this tends to make one a bit mad, but then again, "we're all mad here" (-The Mad Hatter).